2013 was a very bad year for me. I started with a concussion, went through a wee bit of depression (sort of like being a wee bit pregnant) and spent nearly 2 weeks in the hospital where I could easily have died. I slept most of the rest of the year, in a pathetically weakened state, due to side effects of medications. I was passed over for a promotion I really wanted (and deserved) by an employer that was pretty content to have me effectively doing two jobs for one paycheck, while driving 80 miles a day to do so. I had homesickness of epic proportions and spent more than a few days wondering “What is the point, exactly?”
Now that it only has a few hours left to kick my ass, I just want 2013 to know…
I learned to appreciate some things this year. Like my devoted spouse who spent countless hours worrying over me, suffering when I suffered, nagging me when needed, giving space when needed as well. I learned that I am much loved by many – kids, sisters, grandkids, friends, cousins, in-laws, outlaws and others – I am truly blessed.
I learned that a few wonderful friends are all you really need. Friends who just knew what I needed and when, who cared for me, cared for my dog, and supported by husband through all the crap. Who texted, caught up with me on Facebook, or e-mailed – and understood my aversion to phone calls.
I learned that being appreciated by your employer for your contributions is better than having the “princess office”, newer technology or deeper pockets. I learned to go after what I wanted because no one was going to give it to me. And I found a job that fits me (and is much closer to home with summers off).
I learned that all of the medical knowledge in the world won’t help you if you are nearly unconscious or too sick to advocate for yourself. Appoint someone who can. I learned that health care coverage is not to be taken for granted as my bills would have totalled nearly a$300,000 for all the care and services I received. I also learned which hospital to avoid if I should ever need medical care again.
I learned that life can change in an instant and although my crises were really minor in comparison to those of many others - my life did not feel like mine at all. I learned that by putting one foot in front of the other – no matter how tired or weak I felt – no matter how overwhelmed I became, I could just keep going just as I always have – just as I always will. I learned that I am strong, capable, and unstoppable.
I learned that my body will not take neglect or abuse forever without rebellion. I will listen. I will appreciate the gift – a strong body – that I have been given.
So 2013 – I am not sad to see you go. Sayonara, 2013. Suck It.