(some of the swear words have been changed to protect your innocence).
In my lifetime I have had to deal with some pretty painful things….childbirth, kidney stones, migraines, shingles, neuromas in both my feet that made every step I took an exercise in torture. But right now I have an injury that is killing me….just killing me.
I have an injured pinky finger. Not broken, but sore as hell. It was a freak accident. I was driving and my pinky got caught in the steering wheel while I was expertly executing a turn. I may have said a few choice words at that time.
In true nurse fashion, however, I did not seek medical attention when it swelled, turned purple, and throbbed for days. When the bruising and swelling was gone, I assumed I was on my way to recovery. Wrong.
Do you know how many times a day you call your pinky finger into action? My day starts something like this….
Alarm clock….(I’m already awake, but that post has already sailed)…throw off the blanket…Ow…darn it, I forgot and grabbed with my right hand.
Turn the doorknob to let the dog out….Ouch, fudge…forgot again.
Make coffee – pour water from gallon jug (our water tastes like crud and makes the worst coffee) Dammit, forgot again…can’t grasp and lift for sure.
Coffee’s done – grab the pot – Damn, that hurt, almost dropped the pot…
Coffee’s poured – pick up the cup. Shit. Ow. Damn.
I have been up for about 4 minutes and I am swearing like a sailor over this “&(*&%$%$” pinky finger.
Finally (oh, about 2 months after the inital injury) I seek medical advice. No fracture Doc S. says, but probably a strained ligament. Needs rest. Tape it to the next finger. If it’s not better in a couple of weeks, ligament could be torn, probably looking at surgery to repair. Splendid.
So, after about 4 days of taping, the finger is feeling a little better. I do remove the tape to type, sometimes to cook, and take it off at night. It has to be replaced every time I wash my hands (or about 100 times a day – I am nurse and slightly germophobic).
So those of you who usually get a handmade ornament or other handcrafted item for Christmas – please forgive me. I can’t stand to hear myself swear anymore. Fortunately, I can drink with my left hand – so I can still enjoy holiday cheer.