Award Acceptance Speech – from the “Dirty” Carpet to the Censorship Required because I can’t find my glasses because I already have them on

It is time (well, past time, actually) for me to recognize some awards that have been bestowed upon me and to mention some bloggy milestones.  Unlike Meryl Streep’s acceptance speech at the Golden Globes, there will be no bleeping required (I hope).

I do not have a Red Carpet here at Casa K8edid, but what carpet is here is covered with dog hair and sand tracked in on the massive paws of the lovely Shelby.  Unfortunately, a 95 pound Shepherd with gigantic teeth and a very loud bark has the effect of keeping the papparazzi at bay so that you are unable to see the lovely outfit that I have chosen for this momentous occasion.

That’s right, I am wearing a fuschia Lazy Forever and a pair of cow udder slippers.  It’s my day off, don’t judge.

I had been nominated for the Versatile Blogger Award 7 times before.  Because I am too stupid technologically challenged and basically lazy, I did not put the Versatile Blogger icon on my blog and so 3 more people awarded me that same award: Sandylikebeach, Kat, and Edward Hotspur.  Since these awards represent the 8th, 9th, and 10th times that I have received this award, I have to assume that either I am very Versatile, or the Versatile Blogger award is given (repeatedly) to people whose writing is so bad there is no way they will ever receive any other recognition.

In addition, Mr. Hotspur (who has inspired me to use my mind-numbing commute for more productive pursuits) nominated me for this award:

Now, I am supposed to do a whole of stuff, like thank the award awarders, tell things about myself, nominate a shitload passel of interesting bloggers I follow, and tell you about my best/most popular/funniest/favorite posts.  Frankly, it being the 8th, 9th and 10th times for the Versatile Blogger Award, I’m too lazy overwhelmed tired overcome with gratitude to tackle all that.

I will tell you that I am working on updating my blogroll to include those bloggers I can’t live without and whose fascinating blogs keep me from a) getting any writing done of my own; b) cleaning the dog hair and sand from the carpet and c) shopping for a more appropriate awards ceremony outfit.  When it is updated, you will find a world of creative, funny, profound, and supportive bloggers who have brightened my world. 

In other breaking news, Sandylikeabeach became my 100th follower recently.  I am amazed that so many people actually read my posts, but I think really you all have just forgotten how to “unfollow” someone.  I appreciate more than any of you will ever know the support, sense of community, and witty repartee that you have brought to me at a stressful time in my life.  It is comforting to know that every post, whether banal or brilliant, will be read by someone, and commented upon.  Thank you all.

In addition, sometime on New Year’s Day, I surpassed the 10,000 hit mark.  That means that either my blog has been viewed 10,000 times or my writing was so bad that some of you passed out and landed on the “refresh” button and managed to drive my stats up unintentionally.  Either way, I’m amazed at that, as well.  And eternally grateful.

I will leave you with these words from Grace Kelly, 1954 Academy Awards: “This is one night I wish I smoked and drank.”

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42 Comments

Filed under humor, Uncategorized

42 responses to “Award Acceptance Speech – from the “Dirty” Carpet to the Censorship Required because I can’t find my glasses because I already have them on

  1. Congrats! And I think you win the “Best Dressed” Award as well!

  2. Congrats to a worthy gal!

  3. Congrats on your well-deserved award. You look pretty versatile from here.

    Forever Lazy??? I think anyone in that getup would be Forever Single – even that skinny, gorgeous model looks like a huge, pink elephant like you see after one too many adult beverages (or so I’ve heard).

    • So I’ve heard, as well. I actually am wearing a vintage Detroit Red Wings hockey jersey (Shanahan), a pair of jeans that are 1 (maybe 2) size(s) too big, and orthopedic shoes. My hair was combed sometime over the weekend, and I have a zit on my nose. The picture of the Lazy Forever was far more attractive than anything the papparazzi could have caught around here today with their zoom lenses.

  4. I’m actually impressed that you have kept track of how often you’ve received these awards. I’ve received the Versatile Blogger Award–not as many times as you–but enough that I have lost count. Only won the 7 Links Award twice–thank God! And thank you for not passing along these honors along to the rest of us who SOOOOOOO do NOT deserve them again

    Great acceptance speech!

    Kathy

    • I’m glad you enjoyed the speech. The awards are sort of like a chain letter, or an e-mail that has been forwarded so many times it can’t even be viewed any longer. It is not that I am ungrateful, but the requirements were tough to do the first couple of times. I think you have to draw the line at how many times you are going to put yourself through that. If you click on any of the blogs on the blogroll or any of the commenters on my posts, you can’t go wrong.

  5. Congrats you have more on the way i’m sure.

  6. Thanks, Harry. I think you may have been my first “follower”.

  7. Love the slippers. is one pair for the dog? And congrats on the awards, the 100 and the 10,000!

    • If only she’d keep them on!!! As it is we have to wrestle her to the floor and wipe her feet with a towel when she comes in.
      Thanks for stopping by Elyse – I enjoy your blog.

  8. All awards so well deserved and I loved the Grace Kelly quote at the end! 🙂

  9. I just wanted to let you know, I’ve awarded you the 10 Awards Award and the 10,000 Posts Award. The rules for them are as follows:
    1) Thank all your followers individually on their blogs.
    2) Bake them all cakes.
    3) Add all their names to the bottoms of all your posts.
    4) Post a 100 page autobiography of yourself.
    5) Have a drink of some sort and completely ignore 1-4.

    Congratulations on your milestones! And no, we read your stuff because it’s good, and we give you awards for the same reason!

  10. You get these awards because your blog is so good. You, my friend, now get to enjoy #5 (listed by Edward Hotspur) on me.

  11. Not only is your blog one of my absolute favorites, this has got to be The Best award acceptance speech evah! You rule the blogosphere, woman, and never forget it. Congrats to you!

    • Today the blogosphere – tomorrow the world…just as soon as I get a good night’s sleep. Glad you liked the speech. I always look forward to your posts, as well.

  12. LOL when I was a very new blogger I got a versatile blogger award that I figured was bestowed out of pity. In fact, I think I got it from you. Maybe if I get a few more I’ll consider posting it. Congratulations. I enjoy your blog a great deal.

  13. first, this post title is way funny. second, you are way funny (in a ha ha way), third, i LOVE that you have a 95 lb shepherd named Shelby, and fourth, what a cool outfit!… oh – and yes, you deserve all the accolades you’ve received Kate. continue…

  14. I swear I only fell asleep once. I thought I dodged the refresh button – apparently, my nose was on it. I’m sorry. I’m sure it only refreshed 200 times, so the remaining 19800 are legit.

    Congrats, K8! Now, as you were … you have more writing to do.

  15. You write and you’re a sharp dresser. What a package.

  16. If cow slippers aren’t versatile, I don’t know what it {says the girl wearing pink panther leggings and a snow hat}. Congrats on your awards!

    • Not just cow slippers – COW UDDER slippers. I wouldn’t be caught dead in plain old cow slippers. Thanks for stopping by – and thanks for the visual…

  17. Congratulations of these awards. You’re acceptance
    speech is wonderful. I think the snuggies look pretty good but a gown might go better with the Grace Kelly quote. You might as well get sloshed in fashion.
    Toodles,
    Isadora

  18. Meryl Streep and Grace Kelly – what very lofty friends you do have. Congrats. 🙂

  19. Congrats on all your stats and awards. All well deserved!!

  20. I think of you more as a Helen Mirren type… lovely and appropriate at all times, with wit, but tact. Also she looked better at the Globes than Meryl did. Brava. Loved the speech. Last line being my favorite.

    • Why thank you….I agree Helen looked better, but Meryl got bleeped for swearing when she didn’t have her glasses and couldn’t read her speech. I spend too much time looking for my glasses (sometimes I have them on already). That last line seems to be popular with lots of folks.

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