Tag Archives: sweet cheeks

All About Today – July 15

July 15 is an important day.  Very important indeed.  It is St. Swithun Day.  Swithun was Bishop of Windsor from 852 to 862 AD.

The name of Swithun is best-known today for a British weather lore proverb, which says that if it rains on Saint Swithun’s day, 15 July, it will rain for 40 days.

St Swithun’s day if thou dost rain
For forty days it will remain
St Swithun’s day if thou be fair
For forty days ’twill rain nae mare

A Buckinghamshire variation has

If on St Swithun’s day it really pours
You’re better off to stay indoors.

So, yeah, looks like it is going to rain for another 40 days.  We’ve had about 15 inches of rain so far this month, so this isn’t exactly a welcome concept.  But this is Florida and it typically does rain each day in the summer, so I guess this is a non-news story.

In REAL news, however, it is National Ice Cream Day.  Designated in 1984 by President Ronald Reagan, the 3rd Sunday in July is National Ice Cream Day (all of July is National Ice Cream Month!)  This is news worth celebrating.

Sweet Cheeks retirement plan – he found 15 cents, 3 bottle caps, and a Bic lighter that day at the beach.

But the real reason today is important, is that it is my beloved husband’s birthday.  Yes, Sweet Cheeks.  I wanted to just take a few minutes to recognize this fine man for all that he does.  His love and support are never-ending.  He is so even-tempered, logical and steady that he is a steadfast foil for my moodiness, snarkiness and sometimes mercurial emotions.  He is the perfect straight man.  He thinks I am smart, and funny – even when I am not.  He does not complain when I spend hours working on lessons plans or spoiling my grandchildren.  He does not mention my hoarding tendencies for beads or shoes.  He would do anything in the world to make me happy, and when I am sad, or lonely or unhappy – his pain equals (or seemingly exceeds) my own.  He is romantic, thoughtful, honest and kind.

If you look in the dictionary for the expression “salt of the earth”, you will see my husband’s picture.  Sure, he’s not perfect – he is mechanically inept, never met a container or package he couldn’t mangle, and shouldn’t be allowed to dress himself – but he is perfect for me.

So, Happy Birthday Sweet Cheeks.


Filed under General Mumblings, Uncategorized

(Re)Negotiating Our Marriage Contract

It’s August, kids.  You know what that means.  Yep, time to renegotiate the marriage contract before the anniversary next month.  While my friends are used to my joking about renegotiating another year on the marital agreement with the old ball and chain  my beloved, not everyone seems to think it is a necessity.  I think a lot of couples could benefit from some serious negotiating.  Sure it isn’t easy, but the rewards could be enormous.  After all – no one really knows what you want or need, unless you tell them (especially those with a Y chromosome).

In the early years, the negotiations might go something like this:

Sweet Cheeks:

I want sex at least once a day.  I’ll need 2 nights a week out with my friends (after which, I would like that day’s ration of sex).  I would like you to sit with me while I watch baseball, basketball, football and hockey.  I will give you a pass on golf.  I will need you to learn the rules of these games so that we can discuss the on-screen action.  I will need to keep a portion of my earnings for my own use.  I will need to be excused from all shopping excursions.  I will need you to attend all my company outings, parties, and functions even though I refuse to attend any of yours.  I need you to stop nagging me about my health.


I would like you to at least wake me up before sex.  I would like you to watch your sports in another room, and I will not be learning any rules, nor discussing said sports.  I will need to keep a portion of my earnings, as well as yours, for my own use.  I would like you to accompany me on all shopping excursions, but I will not ask you to hold my purse.  I will attend as many of your work functions as you do mine.  I need you to listen to my advice about your health.


See, there’s room for compromise here.  Then, after a decade or two:

Sweet Cheeks:

I would like sex at least once a day.  Instead of 2 nights out a week, my friends will be coming to the house all weekend for prolonged sports watching, scratching, crude jokes, and belching.  I will need a portion of my earnings, as well as yours, for our beer and snacks.  I’m not going to the mall, but you and kids can go as often as you like.  I will give your “unrelenting PMS” as an excuse for your absence from my work functions.  I will verify any health advice you give me with my doctor, and once he/she confirms that you are right, I will only listen to him/her.


Go ahead and let me sleep through sex, I need my rest.  I will join your sports watching buddies and drink your beer and eat your snacks because I know it annoys you.  My girlfriends and I need the house for poker one Saturday night a month, during which you will be responsible for finding or providing child care at a separate location at least 10 miles from the house.  I will give “explosive diarrhea” as your excuse for not attending any of my work functions.  I will refrain from saying “I told you so” when your doctor confirms the medical advice I gave you, especially about that little melanoma incident….


See, still adjusting our demands and making concessions…And this year:

Sweet Cheeks:

I would like sex every day and a prescription to make it happen.  I need you to keep your voice down during the sporting events I am sleeping through. I’d like you to go out with your friends more so I can sit around in my underwear.  Neither of us will attend any work functions and we will both use “death in the family” as our all purpose excuse.  I need you to give me health advice because I want to be here with you a long time.


I will be replacing at least 1/2 of your little blue pills with a placebo. I will let your sleep through your televised sporting events if you will let me sleep through my favorite programs.  I will need you to switch to boxers if underwear is going to constitute your entire wardrobe for the day.  Agreed on the “death in the family” excuse.  I will be happy to give you health advice, and even nag you, because I need you around for a long time.

See, nothing to it.  Guess we’re probably good for another year.


Filed under General Mumblings, humor, Uncategorized

Bryce Canyon National Park

Dear Friends –

I had to work today.  All day.  With makeup on.  And shoes. I actually styled my hair.   It was horrifying (the job – not my hair).  And wonderful (again, the job – not my hair).

The bad news is, every cell I have hurts and I can’t even think about writing a post.  The good news is I’ve decided to share more of my vacation pictures with you.

You’re welcome.

Cedar Breaks National Monument near Bryce Canyon National Park

Cedar Breaks Natioinal Monument

Bryce Canyon National Park. Incredible beauty.

Beautiful natural sculptures.

Cliff caves - Bryce National Canyon

The weather was,once again, spectacular.

My leg injury kept me from walking to the floor of the canyon, next trip I will definitely make that trek.

The colors were so vibrant - I only wish I had read my camera's owner's manual before we left, I probably would have gotten better shots.

All of these photos are unretouched (only because I don't know how).

Again, trails and paths I would have loved to walk, but because of my mangled legs I could not.

Just be glad I don't post all the pretty blue sky/fluffy could pictures...

The little "statues" are called hoodoos.

More hoodoos.

Such beauty, and shared with my best friend in the world.


Filed under General Mumblings, Photos - Travel and Other, Uncategorized

Honey, I’m Home

I have returned to my steamy Southern nest after a 7 week hiatus (actually 51 days, but who’s counting?).  I enjoyed my time in Michigan very much, but am so happy to be “home”.

Home, I’ve decided, is a very relative term.  I have a home in Florida.  It has taken me a long time to consider this domicile my real home.  I have a home in Michigan (currently rented to our son, Lefty).  It is hard to visit your “home” when you don’t live there anymore, and it really isn’t your home any more, even though you still hold the deed and you decorated every room in it.  It is strange to see other people’s belongings in the “home” you lived in for 23 years.

I have a summer “home”, of sorts, a 35 foot travel trailer in a private campground/resort in the woods of northern Michigan.  It is like camping, but not.  After all, I slept in a real bed every night, had a stove, fridge, microwave, toilet and shower (albeit very tiny).  I had hot and cold running water.  Hardly camping.  We slept 10 people inside one night when record high temps drove us to turn on the AC – like I said, hardly camping.  I usually had 2 or more grandchildren with me at any one time, sometimes all 5 of them at once.  It was a magical summer, filled with daily swims, long walks, campfires, fishing, pine trees and lots of love.

When I was in Florida, I wanted to be in Michigan.  When I was in Michigan, I missed parts of my life in Florida.  You know, the parts where I have phone service, internet, more than 2 television stations with really bad reception, my own roomy shower, and access to real stores.  I missed my beloved Sweet Cheeks most of all.

In Florida I miss things like seeing my sons, Pancho and Lefty, often and providing them with the best motherly advice (usually unsolicited and -equally – usually ignored).  I miss grandkid hugs, seeing them grow overnight, cool summer evenings around a campfire, hearing the loons before falling asleep and upon awakening, and cold, springfed lakes.

I returned to Florida earlier than planned as I accepted a job offer that required me to begin working this week.  So, I guess, for me “home” is several places – wherever I am at the moment – places where memories are made, love is shared, and laughter abounds.


Filed under General Mumblings, Uncategorized